They let me out.

A lot’s happened in the world of RL since I was last around. Who would have thought a team from Toronto (in Canada !!??) would play at Batley? Mind you, it’s more credible than Batley visiting Toronto.

Next up could be New York (that’s not City Knights by the way) although no-one seems to have noticed their proposed stadium is actually in New Jersey. I mean that’s like a team called Oldham playing in Stalybridge.You couldn’t make it up.

Then there’s a Test match in Denver, Colorado. You need oxygen masks there ‘cos it’s a mile high!

Meanwhile, back in Oldham, Roughyeds play on plastic: if plastic does as much for them as it once did for Latics we’ll soon be back in Sooper, Dooper League. If only!

In other news the RFL have given us Oxford, Coventry, Hemel Hempstead, Gateshead, Newcastle, Gloucester, Bristol (then not Bristol), Toulouse and Catalans. [Whatever happened to Bramley among that lot?]. That’s not to mention North Wales, South Wales, West Wales, Sperm Wales and Humpback Wales. It’s called expansion and must have expanded the spectator base by about ooh! 4 men and 2 dogs.

Super League apparently goes from strength to strength (lies, damned lies and statistics springs to mind). St. Helens, Warrington and Salford have new stadia (it’s Latin so the plural isn’t stadiums, fools). Salford’s ground is so good you have to pass through Checkpoint Charlie to get in or out (historical reference for you there). Leeds Rhinos seem determined to build a new stand every year they’re so rich: don’t you just wish you’d bought that house on St Michael’s Lane? After all this new construction I watched Castleford Tigers at something called the Mend-A-Hose Jungle. I must say socks and ladies’ stockings can’t be much cop on Cas market if there’s that much money in darning. Anyway, I thought I was back at dear old Watersheddings ‘cos the ground hadn’t changed in 20 years except for some caravans where the railway line used to be.

Enough for now, folks (you see I’m not totally out of touch when I know people are all called ‘folks’ by American Presidents). I’ll be back next month with more ramblings from the ionosphere (yeah, I don’t know what it means either).

Illegitimi non carborundum, Iva

 

 

Posted by Geoff Cooke